Playing games together

Moments Like These

I’ve heard other parents who have boys and girls talk about their children being best friends. This is a fairly foreign concept for me because my brother and I were friends…. only when nobody else was around for us to play with. And only when I followed my brother’s rules for all the games. And only when we were between the ages of 5 and 11. After that, no promises.

Well, I don’t know if it’s that 2.5 year age difference (both my brother and I, and Cam and Demi) that inspires competition, or if it’s just something in the differences (or similarities) in their personalities, but I don’t get the feeling Cam and Demi will be “best friends.”

That is okay. I acknowledge that they can have a good relationship regardless–that they’ll have a shared experience in life, and will hopefully respect and support each other.

But, now, at 2.5 and 5 years old, we’re seeing small moments where they cooperate and it’s so lovely that it almost cancels out all the conflict and crying. I think Cam will enjoy showing his sister how to do things over the years, but I can tell that Demi only wants a certain level of help because she is so proud of her ability to do things by herself.

As an aside, Cam asked me if I wanted to practice math with him. So, he wrote out a couple equations on paper (addition only for now). He got both of them correct, even with his cute backwards 4. Then he demonstrated the equation in objects. I love watching his brain develop now that he’s in school. His advancement seems faster than I was expecting. Here’s 3 (acorns), plus (indicated by a magnet) 4 acorns , equals (another magnet) 7 (acorns).

Cam Equations

When I asked him how many letters in the alphabet, he cheated by counting the alphabet puzzle spaces, but he nailed “26”. I haven’t really seen him count objects accurately when the numbers get that high. So, another success!

Be In Spider!

When I’ve giggled at and re-watched a kid video 3 or 4 times, that’s a sure sign I should put it on the blog.

Demi has a Michelle Obama board book with phrases like “Be Inspired” and Demi likes having us read the words and she repeats them. I can’t stop laughing at her attempts to say the long words. She’s an articulate girl for her age, but she still hangs onto some mispronunciations with common words (we forever call them pinotails, not ponytails, and things like “strillo” for stroller) and she gets tangled in the long words too. I love it.

Here’s the cutie patootie.

Do You Know How Much I Love You?

Here’s another Cam Says / Demi Says, but holy smokes, this one was a doozy. Let’s start with that one…

Me to both Cam and Demi: do you know how much I love you both?
D: I o’ know (how she says I don’t know)
Me: A lot.
D: Seven?
Me: Way more.
D: Hundred?
Me: Way more.
C: Like a million hundred, ninety eight hundred, ninety eight?
Me: Yeah, more like that.
C: But you wouldn’t want to count to that many. It would take a long time.
Me: I agree, that wouldn’t be fun.
C: Yeah, by the time you get to that number, you’d be gone.
Me: oh?
C: Yeah, you’d be up there. [Gestures to the sky]
Me: Oh. Hmm. Probably….

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Demi was sitting on the counter while I made her breakfast. When I opened the fridge to get out the peanut butter and jelly, I said, “Woah, the fridge is stinky!”

Demi said, “brother poop in it?”

___

One day later Demi and I were leaving the house for errands and when I opened the car door I realized the night before leftovers were inside. I said, “Woah, what’s that smell?”

Demi then said, “brother toot?”

___

A few days ago I handed Demi a wipe and asked her if she would wipe off her mouth and hand.

She responded sternly with a slight smile, “No mommy, me no wipe my mouth and hands!”

Surprised, I said, “Excuse me, where did this attitude come from?”

She replied, “My mouth!”

___

Last thoughts from Cam before falling asleep at bedtime:

Do rainbows only happen when there’s rain and sunshine at the same time?

Does this… [uses his finger to draw a question mark in the air]… mean a mystery?

Night Terrors

Okay, so Demi actually does get night terrors, maybe once every other week, but what I’m actually referring to with the title of the post is my children. My perfect little angel faces that seem to have a tough time going to bed lately. And staying in bed. Any bed. Pick a bed. If only they would just stay in a bed.

Tonight was a fine example.

Joe went out for a rare meet-up plus drinks with an old friend. He left the house at 7:45 as we were wrapping up bath time. The following 1.75 hours nearly broke my spirit.

First up was Demi. In addition to the usual antics (telling me she wasn’t tired after telling me she was tired and asking for bread which she stuffed into her mouth in one bite), she also went through the following excuses to not go to sleep:

  • “Me want my daddy”
  • “Where is my daddy?”
  • “Why?”
  • “Where Coco?”
    • I then proceeded to turn the house upside down looking for Coco and as I was giving up with Demi whining in the other room, Cam confessed he hid Coco behind Demi’s bed
  • “Where Hattie?”
    • Hattie was quite a bit easier to find thank god
  • “Me blanket”
    • I pulled up the sheet only because it’s a warm night
  • “No, other blanket”
    • I pulled up the second blanket
  • “I have a snaggle”
    • Last time she said that, she actually did have a giant rip in her fingernail that was snagging the sheets, so mom guilt from that caused me to turn on lights and clip her non-existent snaggle
  • “Brother coughing. Too loud.”
    • Seriously!?
  • “Where’s my daddy? Me sad. Me want my daddy.”
  • “Me pinotail in my way” (followed by a fake cry)

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Next up was Cam.

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Since Demi took so long to fall asleep, he got more than just his “20 minutes of cartoons” which always makes him extra greedy for more. I warned him before putting Demi to bed that we’d have to turn the TV off immediately after I came out and he agreed that was okay (“unless it’s really close to the end,right mom?”). So, of course, I turn off the TV and tears.

My next move was to tell Cam all about crazy Demi so he would potentially act more mature about bedtime and cut mom a break. It seemed as though it was going to go that way because he calmed down and then:

  • “I must not have had enough dinner”
    • Gave him a cheese stick
  • “I’m still hungry”
    • I explain it takes time for cheese sticks to travel to the stomach
  • He pours his blue cup of water from dinner into Demi’s pink cup from dinner so he could reclaim the pink cup he wanted so bad. Then he drinks the contents. Lo and behold the pink cup had a sprinkling of mom and dad’s salad topping (which included chili flakes) and he proceeds to lose his mind over the burning. Tears, running around, gargling water, crying, asking how long it’s going to burn. After 4 cups of water and 1 cup of milk, he says it’s a little better.
  • “I have to go to the bathroom”
  • “I don’t think I got it all out”
  • “Where’s Bun-Bun? I can’t sleep without Bun-Bun.”
    • I systematically tear apart his room, then check the living room, then check the back patio and begin to lose my mind. I tell Cam I can’t find Bun-Bun but Elephantie would love a snuggle and he starts wailing. A few minutes later I tell him I can’t do anything about it, start arranging his sheets and find the coveted Bun-Bun.
  • Cam asks if we can snuggle, of course we can, and he nuzzles his head into my chin and continues burrowing until I’m hanging off the bed.

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Between my mental notes that “change gon’ come” and “how much longer do I have to balance my body on the edge of the bed?” I attempted to summon some gratitude. It was a good day, my crazy kids are healthy, there is a bottle of wine on the counter and I will too soon be handing my keys to my teenager, so I’d better suck it up and enjoy it for what it is.

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Popalops and Pinotails

I’m already rolling into Demi Says, Part 2! Why? Because Daddy-O and I each independently observed her language explosion over the last couple weeks and were discussing how surprised we were that she was communicating so well, and with improving sentence structure and vocabulary in general.

Now I know I already noted that she calls lollipops “popalops” but I hadn’t already noted that she calls ponytails “pinotails” (pronounced pee-no-tails). I decided if she ever has her own blog it should be called Popalops and Pinotails and she’d at least have one devoted reader. I wish she would call them popalops and pinotails forever.

Here’s a photo of Daddy-O’s best pinotails to date:

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Some others:

Yesterday, Demi had a fever the whole day. It rose and then we gave her medicine (“meh-sin”) and it came down again, all day and all night long. This morning as I was tip-toeing around the house getting ready for work and trying not to wake the recovering patient, she quietly walked into the kitchen and startled me with “Hi Mama!” to which I accidentally slipped out, “Sh*t!”

After I gained my composure and gave her a hug. I asked her how she was doing. She said “me all betta, no more feeber.” She definitely wasn’t 100%, but she was right that the fever broke and she must have felt better.

It made my mommy heart happy that she at least sort of understood the situation and her condition. I think it bodes well for minimizing the tantrum phase if she can process these kinds of concepts and give feedback that we understand and can respond to.

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Tonight, when I got on the road after work, I called the fam to check in. I can surprisingly have a back and forth with Demi which goes something like this:

D: Mama almost home?
Me: Almost, I’ll be home soon.
D: Where are you?
Me: On the freeway, I’ll be home in just a little bit.
D: All done working?
Me: Yes, all done working.
D: I love you.
Me: melty and swooning as much over her conversation as over her itty bitty little phone voice.

At that point, it was a little after 6 and Demi told Joe she was tired. I was bummed to hear this because that meant if she actually fell asleep that early, I wouldn’t get to see her.

When I got home at about 7, I tried to make a quiet entrance and she came running around the corner. I greeted her and said, “I thought you were going to bed, what happened?” She responded with, “I climb out of bed mama.”

Oh how I love how simple and matter of fact kids can be.

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Other words/phrases/sentences/commands she has tackled pretty successfully:

  • Garage door open mama
  • Me hungry now mama, breakfast
  • Like it! or Mila like it! or Me like it! or Mama like it!?
  • Careful mama
  • Demi self, Demi do it, Demi turn
  • Great Grandma Bernice gave her a Goldilocks and the 3 Bears book that had a little stuffed Goldilocks with it. The other day she pulled the book out and asked “Me Goldilocks?” to ask where her doll was. Seriously she said Goldilocks.
  • Daddy do brother laundry. All dirty. Jacket dirty.
  • Monkey gave it to me
  • Santa gave it to me
  • Raaaaaaining! Poooooouring!

I absolutely love listening to her talk, free-form, after we read books and turn off the lights. She often rambles about her day and says really cute sweet things that I just respond with “oh yeah?” and “very good” and “thank you for telling me” because they really are stream-of-consciousness with a bunch of nouns in a row like “Inny, Poppy, Larson, Baby Steely, brother funny,” and then she usually caps it off with a “me happy” or “I love you mama.”

Mommy Happy?

This morning, as with most Tuesdays and Wednesdays, I got up a little after 6 and got ready for work on tiptoes so as not to wake anyone. I was out the door by 7:20, commuted in the rain, pushed through 9 hours of work, commuted home, and then when I pulled into the driveway, the kids were in my car before I could even get out of it. At which point we were off to the races…

Some evenings are hectic. Even when we follow a nice predictable routine, and even on the days when I work in Carlsbad and don’t get home in time for the whole thing.

Tonight though, I was present for most of it and Joe and I stuffed several things into a couple short hours including dinner, showers, dishes, lunch prep, coloring, a little whining and fighting, a dog walk, multiple water spills, toothbrushing, reading and finally lights out.

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I laid with Demi and Joe laid with Cam.

I was relieved to be taking a pause.

As Demi started to settle, she laid her head on my chest and said “Mommy happy”… it was halfway between a question and a statement.

I answered her, “Yes baby, you know why? Because I love you and we had a good night and now I get to cuddle with you.”

She then said, this time distinctly as a statement, “me happy too.”

And added, “brother happy too.”

What a way to end the day, with a little perspective from my almost two year old. She melted me and helped me forget the hustle and nonsense of the day while I happily, contentedly listened to her drift off to sleep.

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Demi Says

A while back I started the series “Cam Says” because so many things out of his mouth inspired laughter or surprise or even amazement.

Demi is now a hilarious little chatterbox herself with her own clever ways of communicating. I feel like she’s picked up language and communication so quickly that I’ve already missed recapping stages of her language development including the cute way words come out before they start sounding like the real word.

So, to pause time right now at 22 months, these are some of her words, phrases, sounds, etc.

  • Santa Claus gave her a new baby doll for Christmas. We asked her what her baby’s name was and without hesitation she said, “Coco.” And since Christmas, most days she recaps to us: “Baby Coco, Santa Claus, sweet boy.” If it isn’t obvious, that means she got her baby Coco from Santa and he is a sweet boy for giving it to her.
  • Also during the holidays, we had a blowup helicopter on the roof with Santa waving out the front window, frosty waving out the back and a spinning propeller. Every day at least twice she asked to go outside and see the “calculare”. That was helicopter. Sounded more like calculator. But we knew what she meant.
  • Other holiday related conversations: “Elfie gone,” “Santa, roof,” “Dee-ah (deer), Bumble?” “Broken, batteries.” “Mickey Mouse!” (neighbors had a 8′ tall blow-up Mickey), “tree sad” (ours got extra crispy).
  • Lollipops = Popalops … OMG this is a cute one to hear.
  • She has many different books featuring animals, one of which has a donkey that says “Hee-haw” and she “hee-haws” with the best of ’em.
  • It is no secret our children like milk. A lot. And because they ask for it so much, sometimes we water it down. Demi now thinks milk always gets water. So as you’re prepping her milk, she coaches you through the process: “Bottle. Milk. Water in it.”
  • A month or two ago, she said I love you for the first time. It sounded like, “Allo you” and now, after a little practice, she says it clearly and frequently, “I love you.” It is often proceeded by “Hi mama.” And she’ll repeat the two phrases a few times just melting me right into a puddle.
  • Typical phone conversation when I’m leaving work to drive for an hour and want to check in on the family: Demi: “Hi mama! I love you!” Me: “Hi baby, how are you?” Demi: “Almost home?”
  • When Joe had a pretty bad cold a couple weeks ago, Demi asked if she could check on him. She’d say “check daddy” and then she’d go to the doorway and holler for him, “daddy okay!?” quite loudly. She now does that regularly, checking in on brother or daddy and yelling into a room “brother okay?” or “daddy okay?”
  • When you tell her something is broken or sick or not feeling well, she’ll give a sad face and say “huggie?” How can you resist a huggie request? You can’t.
  • On work days when I come into the house from my office she asks “work done?”
  • She knows when I want “more coffee”.
  • She sits on the counter in the morning while I make breakfast and reaches over and opens the blinds and asks, “betta’ mommy?” Yes Demi, betta. For Joe, she likes retrieving hats for him and demanding he put them on and then she asks in a sugary sweet voice, “betta daddy? Cozy?”
  • Same for when she’s seated next to our water dispenser. She first asks “water, mommy?” And I’ll say “okay”. And then she prompts me to say please by saying “please?” So I say please. Then she fills up a cup and hands it over. When I finish she asks, “more water?” And repeat until I’m overly hydrated.
  • She says “bless you” when people sneeze.
  • She says “thank you” when you do her a favor.
  • She says “excuse me” when she needs you to move.
  • She says “sorry” even when it’s Cam’s turn to say sorry. “Sawee brudder.”
  • If anyone is climbing on anything, most particularly an adult on a ladder she demands they be careful, “careful daddy!”
  • When we play our kid-friendly regular music, she requests the “meow meow” song and then shortly after she requests Cam’s favorite song, which he’s always referred to as the “Beat Boys” so she asks for “Bee Boys mommy?” It’s actually Drift Away by Uncle Cracker and I’ve heard it no fewer than 200 times in the last 5 months.
  • As of the last several days she has gone into “myself” and “own” mode much more aggressively than Cam ever did, so far as I can remember. She wants to get her “own diapa” and do things “Demi self” and if you get too close to what she’s doing she gets mad quickly.
  • Most frequent phrases include:
    • “See mommy?” or “see daddy?” or “see brudder?”
    • “Brudder funny”
    • “Brudder anything”
    • “Hungy” which already is turning into “Hungry”
  • She talks about going to “Monkey house” and “Gina house” frequently.
  • When I ask what she did today, she says “Inny house. Poppy. Lawson.”
  • When she talks on her phone she says “Hi Poppy!” then pauses and says “no” and then says “bye Poppy.”
  • During Halloween, most everything was “‘pooky!” said in a low voice with a serious face.
  • All food is described as “picy” (spicy) or “hot”. Oddly enough she likes spicy and can tolerate hot pretty well too. Cam can’t handle either.
  • She started sort of counting, “two! three! two! three!” for a few weeks and just the other day she said “one! two! three!” as well as “three! two! one!” Every time she asks for something and you say “just one, okay?” she negotiates with “two?” again in a sugary sweet voice and both hands in front of her face indicating two, followed by a “please?” More often than not, she gets two.

Where Are They Now?

Haha. Just kidding. But it has been a bit since I’ve had time to post. Demi is communicating really well now and she loves her brother. Cam is getting taller and thinner (so so sad to see the rest of the baby fat melt away) and he is very curious. He asks so many questions I cannot answer without Google.

Here’s a clip of them terrorizing the birds at Lake Murray…. we feed them bird seed and then we frighten the feathers out of them. It’s quite a relationship.

Love hearing these squeals.

Kauai Vacation 2018

It’s been a bit since we got home from vacation, but I am fiiiiinally posting about it. One thing that struck me after vacation was that we rarely vacation without family or friends or someone to visit. While we loved it, it also highlighted the benefits of being with other folks. I think we would have pushed ourselves to do more different things. Nonetheless, it was a vacation to remember.

First the whole mashup of photos, then the lowlights and highlights.

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Lowlights:

  • Demi decided she’d rather drive than sit in a car seat, so each time we got into the car for a 2 minute drive or a 2 hour drive, she’d try to get into the front or lose her mind screaming. This would go on for a couple minutes or up to 30, which was just awful. It reminded us that we’re entering official tantrum zone with her.
  • When Cam had an accident in his pants during dinner in the bathroom of a restaurant and I had to run him out to the car with no pants on to change into his wet board shorts and finish dinner.
  • Cam and Demi tug-o-warring over _____ (fill in the blank with whatever you want–a towel, the door knob, a piece of broccoli). This was also an indicator we’re entering that era where we need 2 of everything and they need to be equal, look equal, sound equal, be shaped equally… or someone is mad.

Highlights:

  • Early morning sunrises on the back patio with coffee!
  • Kiddie pool at the condo was 2 feet deep which means the kids could flounder about happily and mostly safely without active assistance. They looooved it.
  • The kids “jumping waves” in Hanalei. I say “jumping waves” in quotes because Joe and I were breaking our backs lifting them up and over aggressive “pre-winter” waves as they shrieked and laughed and couldn’t get enough.
  • Shave ice every day. Favorite: Wishing Well outside of Hanalei.
  • Evening/night swims.
  • The beach in Poipu was the best suited for small kids and therefore allowed Joe and I to chill a little more while the kids were still thoroughly entertained.
  • All. The. Birds. There were sooooo many native birds. We fed the “nenes” (geese) each morning, watched the red-headed cardinals, tall white birds, and chased chickens and roosters around everywhere. Demi called the chickens “bawk bawks” so we spent a good portion of our vacation talking about bawk bawks.
  • The rain followed by a rainbow! We only caught 1 rainbow, but it was a really good one.
  • Naps after getting sun-kissed.
  • The moments when the kids were cooperatively playing. This happened in short bursts every day.
  • When Cam sounded out and spelled “pool” to earn going to the pool one evening.
  • How Demi now calls all bodies of water “pool” even if it’s the ocean. It makes me giggle.
  • Cam’s drawing of the Hawaiian Islands which included several volcano islands, the one we were visiting and the one that Joe and I got married on.
  • For me: poké every day, no cause to put on makeup, convenient entertainment, discovering organic non-refrigerated milk (what!? It exists.), the scenery, the beer, listening to the waves to put us to sleep.